Friday, February 18, 2005
The Song
Well, it is my limited understanding, and only going by two very insular American friends, ;-) that the folks singing this song is or was not known in America. They were the same time as Abba, and at least in Europe their biggest competition, tho always stayed second place to them generally speaking. But in the early 1980's, (I think) this song was number one for many weeks. Would like to see a song with a Biblical theme so readily taken up here today. They had a string of hits, such as "Brown girl in the ring" "Ma Baker" "Rasputin" "Belfast" "Mary's Boy Child/Oh My Lord" and a whole lot more. But I find music one has been fond of, even with the times a changin', at least as far as personal taste goes, they stand the test of time.
By the rivers of Babylon, there we sat down
ye-eah we wept, when we remembered Zion.
By the rivers of Babylon, there we sat down
ye-eah we wept, when we remembered Zion.
When the wicked
Carried us away in captivity
Required from us a song
Now how shall we sing the lord's song in a strange land
When the wicked
Carried us away in captivity
Requiering of us a song
Now how shall we sing the lord's song in a strange land
Let the words of our mouth and the meditations of our heart
be acceptable in thy sight here tonight
Let the words of our mouth and the meditation of our hearts
be acceptable in thy sight here tonight
By the rivers of Babylon, there we sat down
ye-eah we wept, when we remembered Zion.
By the rivers of Babylon, there we sat down
ye-eah we wept, when we remembered Zion.
By the rivers of Babylon (dark tears of Babylon)
there we sat down (You got to sing a song)
ye-eah we wept, (Sing a song of love)
when we remember Zion. (Yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah)
By the rivers of Babylon (Rough bits of Babylon)
there we sat down (You hear the people cry)
ye-eah we wept, (They need that ???)
when we remember Zion. (Ooh, have the power)
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Thursday, February 17, 2005
Feedback...
My audible book subscription reaches the point again in the next few days, that I can choose two audible books. I've already put an Audible Bible (one of Max Macleans) to be one of the choices, as my one great torment when my brain goes on holiday like recently, is on top of being in severe affliction and distress, is that when the brain involvement moves up as this time again, reading in any real way is impossible, and so I am under affliction in distress and bascially suffering from Spiritual starvation for the most part. I'm thinking the Audible Bible is a way around this. But two books a month I can get, so, has anyone heard of this book, if it is any good? Or if it is one of these new type of health and wealth prosperity gospels, like the Prayer of Jabez is. I really don't know of many Christian writers alive today, to have an opinion on what they are like. I normally read "old dead guys" But do know many of them today turn down many crooked lanes. This one is by Rick Joyner.
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Second Ponderization...
I've always said, if I had a brain I'd be dangerous, so guess when my brain goes on holiday (as compared to normally) like currently and last few days, the world is a safer place.
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Ponderization....
Watch out for Bill
I hate Bill, paying him takes all my money! It may keep my credit rating good, but watch out for Bill, he's never satisfied.
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Prayer
Prayer
Prayer is the soul's sincere desire,
Unuttered or expressed,
The motion of a hidden fire
That trembles in the breast.
Prayer is the burden of a sigh,
The falling of a tear,
The upward glancing of an eye
When none but God is near.
Prayer is the simplest form of speech
That infant lips can try;
Prayer the sublimest strains that reach
The Majesty on high.
Prayer is the Christian's vital breath,
The Christian's native air,
His watchword at the gates of death;
He enters heaven with prayer.
Prayer is the contrite sinner's voice,
Returning from his ways;
While angels in their songs rejoice,
And cry, "Behold, he prays!"
O Thou, by whom we come to God,
The Life, the Truth, the Way;
The path of prayer Thyself hast trod;
Lord, teach us how to pray. James Montgomery
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I long for..
A dog. Its number one on my wish list at present. But its also impossible at least until I get moved. But when my health takes a turn for the worse like this weekend gone, and the brain is seroiously impacted, so that yesterday I spent about 14 hours in a river of tears, and all I can do is lay on my bed, alone, looking at the ceiling, (or even worse watching TV) weeping, when tho my lifestyle is very immobile and housebound, I do normally spend hours a day reading, but once the brain stuff in this kind of degree kicks in, tis not possible to any real degree.
So, I lay on my bed, weeping, staring at the ceiling, calling out to God to save me, and I remember how I used to always have dogs on my bed, when I had the flu or something. How the look of love in their eyes used to make it feel worth being alive, if even for that, and now even that is impossible at present. I really do feel like God's orphan, as sickness is not easy for anyone. To bear it in such distress at times, normally alone in the temporal world, is I think when I get a small glimpse of what hell must be like.
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Wednesday, February 16, 2005
My God..
My God, My God, why have you foresaken me?
Maybe I think they are the saddest words in the Bible, cos when I am as low as now, its the words I scream Heavenwards. And when this low, its also because I'm bearing the burden of others sins. Living with the consequences of a reign of horror and terror that would seem unimaginable to most people.
This terror has taken me to the brink of suicide in earlier years with more than one attempt, The pain of living with the consequences of it, and with a constant reminder of how much has been lost, how much was never there, how I never belonged in this world, often makes me feel there again. The nut houses are full of people whose brains are healthy, but there emotional distress is so bad, they can't function, often caused by grief and pain, normally or often by the sin of others against them. When you're brain is damaged in some way to start with thru illness or desease, then it takes you a step further beyond just the emotionally hurting people in the funny farms, it consumes you. And when you've spent hours asking, where is God in all this? Why doesn't He rescue me. Why doesn't He show He loves me, that would be enough to make this bearable. And the answers don't come, maybe because of the emotionally vegative state. So, you are still crying in the wilderness and looking Heavenwards and still asking, My God, why have you foresaken me?
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Hopeless Life
Hopeless Life.
I hang down my head, and close my eyes,
And my misery and pain
Come rolling down my face.
For all the things I wanted,
But did not get.
For all the things I did not want,
Forced down my throat.
I look up, into the heavens,
And scream, without my voice,
Sending a shiver down my spine.
I believed in you, I believed you,
And you let me down,
Cast me out, the foolish one.
And now my last wish,
Is no longer a wish,
But an ultimatum.
Take this hopeless life away,
......
From:
Pisidia.
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Tuesday, February 15, 2005
Song...
Well, most long time readers of my blog, will know I only used to have this song playing on my blog when various things were hurting so bad, I thought they would destroy me. Sometimes, that's still the reason, of things of a personal nature, and even when its not, I can't listen to this song without weeping, yet mostly now, its one of hope, of God calling me as He does all of us Home at some point. And to stand before the throne of grace, will know for sure, that every tear counted, every sigh was heard, it wasn't all for nothing, and I'll finally be where I belong and often now, long to be.
My Father's Chair
Sometimes at night I'd lie awake
Longing inside for my father's embrace
Sometimes at night I'd wander downstairs
And pray he'd returned, but no one was there.
Oh, how I'd cry, a child all alone
Waiting for him to come home.
Chorus:
My father's chair, sat in an empty room
My father's chair, covered with sheets of gloom
My father's chair through all the years
And all the tears I cried in vain
No one was there in my father's chair.
Sometimes at night I sit all alone
Drifting asleep in a chair of my own
When sweet sleepy eyes peer down from the hall
Frightened by dreams they cannot recall
I hold them close, calming their fears
Praying they always will say,
Chorus:
My father's chair sits in a loving room
My father's chair, no matter what I do
My father's chair, through all the years
And all the tears I need not fear
Love's always there in my father's chair.
Sometimes at night I dream of a throne
Of my loving God, calling me home
And as I appear, He rises and smiles
And reaches with love to welcome His child
Never to cry, never to fear
In His arms, safe and secure.
Chorus:
My Father's chair sits in a royal room
My Father's chair holds glory beyond the tomb
My Father's chair, my God is there
And I am His eternal heir
Someday I'll share my Father's chair.
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WELL?
"What do you want?"
I wonder... ?
What he is listening to?
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Today in Christian History
Still up!! Shhhh! Are not tired no more!!
February 15, 1386: Jagiello, king of the Lithuanians, is baptized. His conversion, the condition of an alliance with Poland, marks the end of established paganism in Europe.
February 15, 1631: John Donne, the greatest love poet of the English language and dean of St. Paul's Cathedral, preaches his last sermon titled "Death's Duel." "We celebrate our own funeral with cries, even at our birth," preached the poet, who was seemingly obsessed with the subject for his entire life (32 of his 54 songs and sonnets are about death).
February 15, 1860: Wheaton College (formerly Illinois Institute), one of evangelicalism's top institutions of higher education, is chartered in Illinois.
February 15, 1905: Christian author Lew Wallace dies at age 77. Wallace famous Ben Hur (1880) conceived on a train ride while arguing about Christ's divinity with famous agnostic Robert Ingersoll. It sold more than 300,000 copies in a decade, making him one of the best-selling religious authors of the 1800s.
February 15, 1497: German scholar and reformer Philipp Melanchthon is born in Bretten, Baden. He and Luther were at times allies (he defended Luther against Johann van Eck and Emperor Charles V) and at other times enemies (Luther thrashed him for his views on the Sacraments, but apologized on his deathbed). Melanchthon's argument for justification by faith alone, known as the Augsburg Confession, is now the basic statement of Lutheran doctrine (see issue 34: Luther's Early Years).
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A Blag before Bed.
As promised! Not that I think anyone/everyone is waiting, but I still promised!!
I was reading on the Internet monks site about Criticism via Christendom, and how much of
Mchael Spencers words rang true. Especially the bit relevant to Evangelical Christianity. I have muttered, (often at times)
how in these circles being nice is often more important than doing or saying what is right in God's eyes. I had occassion with personal experience of this not long ago. When some folks were definitely in the wrong about a matter that was both injurious and ungodly in many respects, and the person who spoke to me (as it was a matter relating to me) about it, said, they had given all the hints they could, they felt the matter was neglectful and careless rather than helpful and caring to me. And then they followed this immediately with, "But I can't tell them that. Because I'm a Christian" So, that bought it home to me in a very real way, how sin can often be winked at in an effort to be "nice". And its also where I have felt some of the pressures in my own life, in my own personal relationships, as you feel like you can be a doormat in some cases as long as you are "nice" about it, that's ok. Is a person who is in sin, either backslidden or unsaved, ever going to be made aware of their sin, by everyone bending over backwards to accomodate and leave them in their sin? Is that the really loving thing to do? I recall I had some cross (minorly) words with a friend, who thought at times a harder line should I take on certain things, yet also, I was getting mixed messages from well respected mature Christians here. But God has made my lightbulb pop on many fronts of late.
and that includes often knowing what is God's will on some things without being swayed by this opinon or that opinion, and this has been one such issue. But it does seem to me, much like Michael Spencer, that many Evangelical Christians, will wink at sin just to keep everyone happy and so that by doing so they are seen as Christ like. Yet didn't Jesus call the Pharisees you brood of vipers? There is a time for walking softly as in anything, but this nice at any cost, is what on some levels has some tendency towards Airy Fairy Christianity, and not a realistic view of people and their lives in any real shape or form. And if one maybe leading a church in some way, and takes that view, how would you know when the one smaller sin you just winked at, has now grown to something far more horrendous and offensive to God, and if you do find out, will you wink at that too, just to be seen to be nice? Peoples souls are at stake here. Its not a popularity contest!
Please can someone tell
dic.com I have the phrase "airy fairy Christianity" patented, and will sell it to them for a fair price!
Its also a strange fact, that when I get my "rants' out on here, its kind of like after drinking two litres of coca cola in two or three hours, when you do that giant burp and find relief!!
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Monday, February 14, 2005
Invention of the Week
never been big on biscuit dunking, but a gingernut now and then was okay to do.
Easy Rider of the week.
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THE DYING TESTIMONY AND LAST WORDS OF MARION HARVIE
"CHRISTIAN FRIENDS AND ACQUAINTANCES, I being to lay down my life on Wednesday next, January 26, 1681, I thought fit to let it be known to the world wherefore I lay down my life, and to let it be seen that I die not as a fool or as an evil-doer, or as a busybody in other men's matters; no, it is for adhering to the truths of Jesus Christ, and avowing Him to be King in Zion, and head of His Church; and the testimony against the ungodly laws of men; and their robbing Christ of His rights, and usurping His prerogative royal, which I durst not but testify against; and I bless His holy name, that ever He called me to bear witness against the sins of the times, and the defections of upsitten [i.e., callous] ministers and professors.
"I give my testimony against the burning of the Covenants, which were solemnly sworn by the three nations with uplifted hands to the great God of heaven and earth. I leave my testimony against all the bloodshed and massacres of the Lord's people, either on scaffolds or in the fields. I protest against banishings and finings, and cruel murderings, especially the inhuman murder of worthy David Hackston. I leave my testimony against the paying of the cess, employed for the bearing down the preaching of the Gospel, and the taking and killing the poor followers of Jesus Christ. I leave my testimony against the professors that say this is not the truth of God for which I suffer, and call the way of God delusion. "I leave my testimony against Mr. Archibald Riddell, who became servant to the bloody lords, and made it his work to make me deny Christ, and betake myself to the ungodly laws of men, and to call the truths of God delusions, which I am to seal with my blood; and I rejoice that ever He counted me worthy so to do. Oh! I may say, What am I, or what is my father's house, that He should have called me out to seal His truths with my blood? - which truths, both ministers and professors have counted prudence to disown and deny; for which the land will be made to mourn, and sorely to smart ere all be done. I leave my testimony against Mr. John Blair, that said I had no more grace than his staff had, and was witness to my sentence that day I got it; and his wife, that said I had no more grace nor [i.e., than] her old shoes, as if grace were not free, and as though Christ had not enough to give me. I leave my testimony against both ministers and professors that have joined themselves in any of these courses of defection with the enemies, and are fast in their camps.
"Now, be humble and lie in the dust, and never give over crying in behalf of the Church, which is so small that it can scarcely be discerned, and never give over till He appear, for I think He is near at hand. Oh! watch, and double your diligence, and hold fast till He come, and let none take your crown, for He is good to the soul that seeks Him. If I were to live again, I would let that perjured crew see that I should be more guilty of that which they call rebellion, in serving my lovely King, and in acting and doing for Him and His glory, if He called me to it; and it is my grief that I have not been more faithful for my master Christ. All His dealings with me have been in love and in mercy. His corrections have been all in love and free grace. Oh! free love! Oh! I am oft made to wonder what it was that made Him take a blasphemer to witness for Him and His truths. I may say, I am a brand plucked out of the fire; I am a limb of the devil plucked out from his fireside. Oh! I am made to wonder and admire at His condescending love. ....
"Now, I leave my testimony against all the backsliding ministers, who, when I began to hear the Gospel, preached the same truths which I am to lay down my life for at this time, but now they are joined in a combination against God, and for the most part are all at the enemies' will; for when I got my sentence, the bloody traitors promised to bring any of our own ministers to us, when before them; and so this gives me ground to say, they are become their servants. Now, the Lord knows I have a sore heart to mention these things; but when I saw some of them there, and they offering us any of the rest, it gives me ground to set it down with a sore heart.
"Now, what shall I say? I have sinned against Him, and I am guilty of the defections, for which my Carcase must lie in the wilderness, and not see the King come home to His habitation. But oh! I am content, and heartily content, that He gives me my soul for a prey; and well is me for it; I think myself not behind. Oh! my love; Oh! my love; Oh! my love; my altogether lovely Christ! "The common report through the country is, that I might have had my life on very easy terms; but I could have it on no easier terms than the denying of my Lord and Master, Christ. First, they asked, if I would retract my former confession, and particularized all the papers I had owned before, and if I would not call Charles Stuart a usurper and the devil's vicegerent. I told them I would not go back in anything, 'for ye have nothing,' said I, 'to lay to me but for the avowing Christ to be King in Zion, and head of His own Church." And they said, they did not usurp Christ's crown. But I said they were blinded and did not see. They said there were but a few of us for these principles. I said they had all the wyte [i.e., blame] of it, 200 and it was most bitter to us, that our ministers had spoken against these truths.
"And, indeed, I think they had not been so cruel to me, were it not these ministers. And so I think our ministers are not free of our blood; for when they spake against us and the way, it hardened these bloody traitors, and emboldened them to take our lives. I leave my testimony against them, for they have caused many poor things to err from the way of God, and many have made ministers their rule, and so the blind have led the blind, and both have fallen into the ditch together. And some think and say: 'Oh! can we quit so many godly ministers? We dow not [i.e., cannot bring ourselves to] quit them.' But I assure you ye shall get a share of the wrath and stroke which God hath prepared for these backsliders and betrayers of their trust. Oh! I wonder what is the reason that men count it their wisdom to deny God, who has been so kind to them, and who have many a day delighted to commend His love to me, with the hazard of their lives; for which I shall be a witness against them.
"Now, I have no more to say: be faithful unto death, or else, woe! woe I woe! to you that are owning Him at this day, if ye do not own Him in all His offices, as King, Priest, and Prophet. Oh! my dear love! well is me that ever He let me know that His love was better than life. Woe to that creature that will not love my lovely Lord Jesus Christ.
"Now, farewell holy and sweet Scriptures, which were aye my comfort in the midst of all my difficulties. Farewell faith, farewell hope, farewell wanderers, who have been comfortable to my soul, in the hearing them commend Christ's love. Farewell brethren, farewell sisters; farewell Christian acquaintances; farewell sun, moon, and stars! And now, welcome my lovely and heartsome Christ Jesus, into whose hands I commit my spirit throughout all eternity. I may say - 'Few and evil have the days of the years of my pilgrimage been,' I being about twenty years of age.
From the Tolbooth of Edinburgh, the women-house on the east side of the prison, Jan. 11th, 1681. Excerpts from
A Cloud of Witnesses
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Sunday, February 13, 2005
No Apologies
Before I get on with the main part of this blag, because over recent months I have changed my habit online as far as blaggng and a few other things go, I am stating so as not to bring dishnour to God.
When I was in regular fellowship which on Lord Days' up until September, I had started to be blagless altogether on the LD. And yet, I felt once housebound since September, that to continue in that vein was rather legalistically minded, and since I am alone here, LD or any other day as far as Christian fellowship goes, it is not stretching the point to say that online activity is for the very greater part, my sole way of being able to be in assembly of the saints. Particuarly during the long nite time hours of a Saturday nite/Sunday morning, which are generally sleepless. I do of course, still devote the day to the One that matters. But to cut oneself off entirely when sick and alone too, is I feel more than God would require of me, when I see the negative impact both emotionally and spiritually that doing so can lead me. I don't think its sinful to blog on the Lord's Day, I have however been heard to say over and over again that this Day is the for the Lord, and I still hold to that, but its easy to be taken out of context and in the process cause someone else to stumble. As there's nothing much like hypocrisy for doing so. Okay, that's the one and only time disclaimer over.
Is the Faith of Arminianism Saving Faith?
But I was reading on another Calvinist site a short while ago, how those who are most against Calvinism and the teachings of John Calvin are normally the ones who have never read anything he had to say. And in my (somewhat limited) experience this is also the case. For anyone who is under the mistaken impression that Calvinism is the doctrine of John Calvin and not that of God as revealed in the Scriptures, then please
Click Here: where in a previous blag the term Calvinism was gone into at length. I often have friendly yet also ground breaking discussions with an Arminian friend. They think me fundamental, and not able to enjoy God, because I believe that God doesn't give us His commandments to only choose the ones we want to keep, but that the whole word of God is to be our life and rule of faith and practice. And being aware they had never read of any Calvin, I lent them my hardback copy a good 18 months ago of
Calvin's Considering the Eternal Predestination of God and they've not yet read it. As the main factor they are so against, is that God can predestine some to Glory, and others to eternal destruction. What often seems to be lacking in the Arminain worldview is that as well as a God of mercy, He is also a God of Justice and a God of wrath. Which is likely why they think my God is a God I can have no joy in, because its not just the good bits and pleasing to men bits many of us try to follow. My main problem with Arminianism, is how they detract from the Glory of God. As God tells us that nothing is more precious to Him than His glory.
Psalm 4:2 Isa 42:8
So, I don't doubt for a minute that Arminians can come to a full knowledge of the truth the same as anyone else, but the question for consideration on theology today would be, if someone denies Arminiansm up to and with including their dying breath. Do you think they can be saved? And whether you're answer is yes or no, if you register whether you are Reformed, or an Arminian, then please back up your reasons for why Arminians who die Arminians can and will be saved or not. (in your opinions) I think their is a time to step away from discussions with different believeing friends. Especially when there is a lack of wanting to know or look stuff out for themselves and find the truths which the Bible holds. As if they don't have the increase and thirst to find out what is so important to the state of their eternal soul, then only God can provide the increase for them to do so. As Doc Martin (Luther) said
| Every man must do two things alone; he must do his own believing and his own dying. |
| AUTHOR: | Martin Luther |
Does it mean I don't pray for them? No! Does it mean I won't aswer their questions? No! Does it mean I dont think they are sincere in what they believe? No! I believe them sincerely wrong, but still sincere in everything they hold to.
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A few Facts
I am always somewhat surprised when such a rare desease as porphyria gets spotlight in the media. Some of it is positive, some like some stuff with CSI miami, is very, negative and basically full of ignorance. But there is a radio programme which is highlighting the desease soon, as they have done once or twice before I think. They are as likely as the health professionals who still get stuff wrong about this desease simply because so little is known about it. Rare deseases do not get money spent on them, in research very much, as the big money gets spent on things that can be mass marketed. Yet, I have porphyria, and have to live with the consequences of many ignornat medical opinions over a time that has lasted decades. They were happy to label me as someone who had seizures and "mental illness" and the drugs taken over very many years can have only made the condition I am in now, more marked. And simply because this is such a rare desease, and I am the owner of this blog, I am going to copy and paste a little from the website connected with the radio broadcast.
Health Care Warriors
This Tuesday evening, February 8th, 2005 on Highway2Health-The Vickie Travis Hour/Health Care Warriors, we welcome
Mrs. Diana-Deets-O'Reilly -http://members.tripod.com/~PorphBook/8.html who will be speaking on Porphyria which is
not a mental disease any more than the flu or diabetes is but rather is a disease that destroys the liver. Electrolyte imbalance is the cause of any mental or cognitive manifestations. Sugar is the emergency treatment.
We are going to learn about Electrolyte Testing and the AIP Enzyme Replacement Study that can be life saving for these patients. We will hear about the cholesterol problems and resultant heart problems that porphyrics daily have to deal with and the other complications that go along with the condition. We will also be learning about the co-existing medical diseases that arise from the manifestation of this disease, one of which is cancer of the liver. We will learn why sugar or glucose is the mainstay medical treatment used for this disease and why diabetes goes hand in hand with porphyria.
Some HMO systems treat medically proven porphyrics as if they were second class citizens and in an inhumane manner because of a limitation in professional educational standards often mislabel these people as drug seekers because of the constant, daily pain they often suffer from. This is a disservice to both the patient and the medical professional.
Medicare isn't doing much better with their treatment protocols of these patients. In fact all medical systems, including Medicare should be ashamed of themselves for what they make the patient go through. Treating a side effect of a disease rather than the disease itself is disgraceful. Education of this relatively common in this country medical condition is the only way to make a positive change.
The only useful test that can prove if a person does have this disease must be conducted during an attack because at any other time it is useless. The only way to be prepared for the possibility of having this disease manifest at any future time is by having a DNA test done. I would think that if there is a family history of this disease that common sense for the medical professional would be to order a DNA test to prepare for the possibility of the manifestation of this disease. However, in this world of medical rationing and inconsistency of medical standards that is unlikely to happen without people demanding this test.
From:
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Invasion of the dream takers...
Sounds horrific.. it almost is!! I like squirrels. Always have. Some of my earliest memories are being in the graveyard in our local area feeding squirrels bisucits. We only have the grey ones here in England. I think the Jersey Isles may have the red ones but on the mainland we don't. But what to do what to do....
A few weeks ago, I was in this room, (where else would I be?) and heard a scrambling sound outside...so stuck my head out the window and it was to see a grey squirrel almost outside my bedroom window and I am up probably at least 25 feet. I don't know who was more scared, the squirrel or I. As he took one look at me and took a kami kaze leap down onto the ground. I on the other hand screamed and held my breath till I saw he landed safely. (not sure why this squirrel couldn't scream for itself..but there you go) but last few weeks, I've had a suspicion something is living in our loft/attic. Noises of scratching and sometimes small bumping keeps me awake or sometimes wakes me up. A woman about ten doors up a few weeks ago, had someone in because she had squirrels in her loft/attic. When we had dogs living here, the squirrels kept well away from the house. (they are not stupid) but since I have been dogless now for almost two years, when Scampi died, (alas poor yorick..oh sorry, wrong blag) they have an open run pretty much. So, the question tonite would be, how would I know before calling anyone to look, if I had squirrels in my loft/attic? As this is only a wild guess, and my imagination runs riot at times. And if I do have squirrels in the loft/attic and call someone to get rid of it/them, will this involve murdering squirrels?
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